Scraps : The End

You were an unpleasant memory; and now you are my reminder.
You’re my reminder to be more cautious of the people I invest my time in. You’re my reminder to see people for who they are and not for who I want them to be. You’re my reminder to fall in love with how people treat me, not what they tell me. But if by chance I do fall for the wrong person again, you are my reminder that I can survive the worst.

How To Woo A Writer

Know the easiest way to woo a writer? For beginners, don’t set your sights on being their muse. A writer’s work tends to be a reflection of things they understand, but their minds are constantly preoccupied by thoughts they cannot grasp and concepts they cannot comprehend. A writer is curious and eternally intrigued; what they already fathom will never fascinate them.

In essence, never be a known entity to a writer. Instead, be the enigma that evades them. Be the emotion that toys with their inhibitions, but one they would still give a part of their sanity to decipher. Be an incomplete poem, be a half-written story; be the crumpled piece of paper tossed frustratingly into a bin because they couldn’t find the words to describe what lies within.

Know the easiest way to woo a writer? Be the paradox they couldn’t put into words.

Hi! (Again)

When I look at the last post from this blog, it almost depresses me. It been more than a year that I’ve managed to hoodwink my own self and everyone around me (who still care about my writing) not updating the blog in the pretext of being busy with one thing or the other. Truth be told, it was just laziness. If they had an award for lazing around, I’d be the undisputed champ.

True, I had my exams and had to study a little to not fail, but it wasn’t like my leisurely activities were cut short in any ways. No. I was still spending generous hours on Facebook and YouTube, doing absolutely nothing of use but only when it came to updating my blog did conscience strike like thunder, telling me that I shouldn’t be wasting valuable time updating my blog that is read by, like, 20 people. So I went on to play Counter Strike instead. The blog kept on dropping down on my priority list and was eventually forgotten to be existent until a good friend of mine read the previous posts here and literally forced me to update this. So here we are.

I think I’ll post more regularly now. Lets see how long that lasts!

 

The Art Of Killing Mosquitoes

Day 9

Mosquito hunting with the electrical bat can surprisingly be quite therapeutic. Especially during study holidays when one frequently feels the need to maim or seriously injure.

It also comes with a LED torch in case you need something bigger than a mosquito, hiding behind the closet, to electrocute to death.

I don’t know what function the torch has in electrocuting mosquitoes to death.

And I’ve only broken one glass so far.

I actually think they should make it into an Olympic sport. Send in a guy with a fully charged mosquito bat, and give him +10 for every dead mosquito and -5 for every bite. And a disqualification for breaking anything, just to keep things interesting.

Happy Birthday, Brother!

Day 19

You know, ever since childhood, I always wanted a sibling. I’d see my friends with siblings in school, who’d talk about how they played together and did fun stuff, or maybe fought over a little toy, and I’d always wonder what it would be like to have a brother. To have someone to call your own. Someone you can share your secrets with, someone who you can call up in times of distress, and most importantly, someone you can trust to be on your side through the odds and evens of life.

I call you brother because that’s what you are for me. My brother from another mother.

And we go a long way back, don’t we? And now that I stop for a moment and reflect back on the past, the days bygone, I can’t somehow manage to recollect the first day we met. It’s like we’ve always been friends, only the friendship strengthened after a point in time.

You’ve been one heck of a guy right from the start. One of my earliest associations in college, you came in as a whiff of fresh air amongst the several other wannabe-suave guys that crowded our department. I’d introspected on it a lot, on what is it really about you that makes you so effortless. So simple. And from what I’ve seen of you in the past two and a half years, it’s been one of the greatest lessons of my life – when the world is running after abstraction, you are exceptionally uncomplicated.

I can’t help but think at this moment how would my life be without you. I know there are other friends, but none like you, who knows every detail of me. Nobody knows which the right words in the right time are like you do. We’ve laughed at each other, and we’ve laughed with each other and I can’t thank you enough for everything that you’ve done for me, for standing with me in times when I needed you to, for making me feel good, for not being judgmental with all my nuisances, and for extending the mental support that you do.
I know I don’t open up as much, but I think your birthday is the perfect moment to tell you all that I don’t in a normal day, to extend my gratitude, and to tell you how important you are to me.

On this day, I wish you prosperity and greatness, health and wisdom, and I pray you get all that you crave and succeed in every endeavour you undertake. I wish you a very happy birthday.

Love
Your Friend

The Laws Of Study Vacations

Day 13

Over the past few days, I’ve made a remarkable observation – the laws governing study vacations are as fundamental as Newton’s laws of motion. Here is a comprehensive guide :

Law of diminishing returns – During the study vacation, there is, on average, a 10% decrease in the total amount of studying that is done on any given day, as compared to the preceding day.

This trend, however, is abruptly reversed and accompanied with a sudden surge in both vigor and panic, at a specific point in time (the “break point”) which usually occurs no earlier than 48 hours before the start of the exam (by which time, of course, the outcome of the examination has become inevitable, and the probability of altering it tends to zero).

Law of failed adherence – No timetable, without exception, however well-planned and seemingly practicable, will ever work as planned or be successfully implemented. This holds good for timetables that extend over months, weeks, days, hours, or even intervals of 10 minutes.

Law of extraneous influences – In the process of attempting to study, all things unrelated to the study material become supremely fascinating, and the student feels an obsessive and compulsive need to stare at blank walls, update blogs and play Criminal Case.

Law of successful recollection (applicable primarily to science students) – If the student possesses the ability to recollect, with reasonable accuracy, just one paragraph from one page after intensive reading for one hour, then the period of study shall be deemed to have been sufficiently productive.

Law of wishful thinking – Every student begins to incessantly replay some impossible fantasy in his/her mind, always ending with some disastrous event (like a gigantic asteroid hitting the college) that results in the cancellation of the approaching exam.

P.S. No asteroid did, unfortunately, crash into my college. I checked.

Final Exams : Because No One Deserves To Be Happy

Day 6
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This picture has been shared around a lot on Facebook. But from what I saw over the last week, I’ve realized that this is a gross misconception. The actual last five minutes (or the last thirty, in my case) were spent thusly:

ragecomic

I even tried asking one of the invigilators what was causing my fellow classmates to make such obvious physical effort in filling out the answers, while I was counting the number of fans on the ceiling. Perhaps there was some kind of a secret puzzle that had to be cracked in order to reveal another question or something. On the first day, I even tried putting all the letters of each line together to see if that would lead me somewhere, only to get “EDSHUI SSATPP MPPW”. How intriguing. It actually didn’t sound a whole lot different than the actual question they had asked, like “What is GQMWP?”

I finally decided that the most effective way to spend all my free time would be to take a quick nap. You’d understand my astonishment when everyone came out of the examination hall and told me that there was no time to finish writing everything they wanted to.

The way I see it, there are two possible explanations here. Either I’m selectively blind to some kind of invisible ink that they use to print the back of the question paper, or I’m just plain dumb. I’m not too sure about the invisible ink.

Anyway, that was a week ago, and then we went on to watch this random B-graded Hindi movie. After a week of not sleeping, you don’t usually care much for such things as quality when you select a movie. Plus, after this ordeal, my mind wanted something titillating.
But unfortunately for me, the one we went to watch got me worked up all the more. Rather than having actresses dance in the rain amidst a jungle, or censored impromptu sex scenes peppered adequately with flashes of cleavage, this one had some strong advice for the audience, delivered in typical Tamil-movie-style ; advice that no fresh-out-of-the-exam-hall college student wants to hear. Advice on the importance of education and studying hard.